He Said, She Said

he said she said

he said she said a blog by Rose Richey.

HE SAID, SHE SAID

As both a Mistress and erotic massage practitioner, I see only too often a substantive proportion of our adult community in less than idyllic relationships, particularly men as they get older.  When I learned about sexology from my esteemed mentor, Aleena Aspley, the fact that women lose interest in sex far earlier than their husbands seems pretty commonplace.  About 90% of the men I see tell the same story.

But it’s logical when you think about it.  It’s how we were designed – evolution.  Survival of the fittest.  A man’s genitals are being constantly stimulated by rubbing on their clothing, whereas a woman’s jewels are pretty well hidden, making their mystique even more alluring to men. 

It also makes perfect sense when a women is nearing the end of her child-bearing years, and her eggs are down to their last, that she would lose interest in sex. Coupled with the transition of hormone production from the ovaries to the adrenals, this doesn’t bode well for most women’s libidos.

This wonderful decade of transition (yes, peri-menopause and menopause add up to about ten years of hormonal upheaval) leaves most women with issues like weight and mood fluctuations, loss of libido, insomnia, hot flushes, vaginal dryness, the list goes on.  Naturally only the most determined women still want to experience intimacy on a regular basis, but they are definitively a minority, in my experience.

Of course, men can father children well into their autumn years, still running on testosterone, the hormone responsible for vitality and virile determination.  But, despite their many exertions, men don’t always get what they want in the bedroom, and eventually give up trying as they tire of being rejected. And what woman doesn’t see an act of gentleness as a prelude to sex, in most instances, especially when efforts to please or appreciate her have typically proven scant and/or single-minded.

But don’t worry, men’s virility comes under fire from stressful health and social conditioning, often way sooner than “male menopause”. 

Let’s look into some of the reasons why this is so.  This may not stop what has become a social norm, but perhaps a look at the other side might make you think about your “other half” in a different light.

he said she said

WHY MEN ARE INTERESTED IN SEX LONGER THAN WOMEN

It is not entirely accurate to say that men are interested in sex for much longer than women, as sexual desire and interest can vary greatly from person to person regardless of gender. However, from my standpoint, there are common factors that may contribute to this perception, which include:

Hormonal differences: Testosterone is a hormone that plays a significant role in male sexual desire, and men tend to have higher levels of testosterone than women. However, it’s important to note that not all men have the same level of testosterone, and there are many other factors that can influence sexual desire.

Social and cultural norms: In many cultures, men are often expected to be more sexually aggressive and have a greater interest in sex than women. This can create a perception that men are more interested in sex, even if it is not the case.

Differences in sexual response: Men and women may experience sexual arousal and response differently. Men often experience more physical and visible signs of arousal, such as erections, while women may experience more subtle physical sensations or changes.

Personal preferences and experiences: Sexual desire is complex and influenced by a variety of factors, including personal preferences and experiences. Some men may have a greater interest in sex than some women, and vice versa.

 

WHY WOMEN REJECT THEIR PARTNERS’ SEXUAL ADVANCES

There can be many reasons why a woman (of any age) may reject her husband’s sexual advances, and it’s important to remember that each individual and relationship is unique. Here are some common reasons:

Lack of physical or emotional attraction: A woman may not feel physically or emotionally attracted to her partner at a particular moment or in general, which can make sexual intimacy less appealing.

Stress and fatigue: Stress and fatigue can have a significant impact on sexual desire and may cause a woman to feel too tired or overwhelmed for sexual activity.

Relationship issues: Problems in the relationship, such as unresolved conflicts or lack of emotional connection, can make a woman feel less interested in sexual intimacy.

Hormonal changes: Hormonal changes, such as during pregnancy or menopause, can affect a woman’s sexual desire and make sexual activity less appealing.

Physical discomfort or pain: Physical discomfort or pain during sexual activity can make a woman reluctant to engage in sexual activity.

 

WHAT PREVENTS A WOMAN FROM EXPERIENCING ORGASM

There are a variety of factors that can prevent a woman from experiencing orgasm, including:

Previous negative experiences: Previous negative experiences with sexual activity, such as sexual abuse or trauma, can make a woman feel anxious or uncomfortable about engaging in sexual activity.

Lack of knowledge about sexual response: Many women may not understand their own sexual response or may not know what types of stimulation they need to experience orgasm.

Anxiety and stress: Stress and anxiety can interfere with sexual arousal and may make it difficult for a woman to relax and focus on the physical sensations of sexual activity.

Lack of sexual stimulation: Women may require more intense or specific types of sexual stimulation than men to achieve orgasm, and their partners may not be providing enough or the right type of stimulation.

Medical conditions: Certain medical conditions, such as diabetes, multiple sclerosis, pelvic or childbirth injuries, can interfere with sexual response and orgasm.

Medications: Certain medications, such as antidepressants, can interfere with sexual response and make it more difficult for a woman to experience orgasm.

Hormonal imbalances: Hormonal imbalances, such as those that occur during menopause or after childbirth, can affect sexual response and make it more difficult for a woman to experience orgasm.

It’s important for women to communicate openly with their partners and healthcare providers about any concerns they have regarding their sexual response and to explore different techniques and methods of sexual stimulation to find what works best for them. Seeking the help of a sex therapist or counselor can also be helpful in addressing any underlying psychological or emotional issues that may be contributing to difficulty achieving orgasm.

he said she said

WHY MEN SEEK INTIMATE RELAXATION

Here are some common reasons why men with partners may seek erotic massage:

Exploration and experimentation: Men may seek erotic massage as a way to explore their sexuality or experiment with new experiences in a safe and consensual setting.

Variety and novelty: Men may seek erotic massage to add variety and novelty to their sexual experiences with their partner.

Physical pleasure: Erotic massage can provide men with physical pleasure and heightened sensations that they may not experience during regular sexual activity with their partner.  Men often consider this a “guilt-free” option for relief rather than having sexual intercourse with an escort, for example.

Stress relief: Like any form of massage, erotic massage can help men relieve stress and tension, both physical and emotional.

Sexual dysfunction: Some men may seek erotic massage as a way to address issues related to sexual dysfunction, such as premature ejaculation or erectile dysfunction.

Fear of rejection: Men may choose to have erotic massage if they fear rejection from their partner, or if they feel that their partner is not interested in engaging in sexual activity.

Sexual incompatibility: Some men may feel that they are not sexually compatible with their partner, and may seek out erotic massage as a way to meet their sexual needs.

Privacy and discretion: Men may choose to have erotic massage because it allows them to keep their sexual activities private and separate from their personal relationships.

It is important to note that seeking out erotic massage is a personal decision and should always be done in a safe and consensual manner. Communication with one’s partner about sexual desires and needs is also important for maintaining a healthy and fulfilling sexual relationship.

 

This is Fred and Joan – your average couple who raised nice kids, see their grandkids regularly, travel often and have absolutely nothing else in common but their unhealthy preoccupation with mobile devices.  They rarely talk to each other or spend quality time alone.  That fell by the wayside when Joan decided Fred’s snoring was too loud and moved into a separate bedroom.

Naturally, Fred is one of my clients and has been for a long time.  I’ve encouraged Fred over the years to try to reconnect with Joan, but he tells me if he tried anything new she would instantly suspect him of infidelity.  He admits they never really had a good sex life, Joan was never an affectionate person and she was totally closed off to any exploration.  His generation is one that believes in marriage for life, happy or not.

Everyone has choices.  To do nothing is still a choice.

 

NOW WHAT?

So now you have an idea of what to do, are you prepared to don the tool belts and get stuck into resurrecting your relationship?

Yes, it’s going to be hard work, make no mistake, because the first thing you both need to do is put down the mobile phones and actually talk candidly and openly with each other.  You are partners after all,  so it’s only the next logical step that you get back on the same page and stop taking each other for granted.

You’ve invested way too many years in your relationship, no matter how it’s shaped up, but don’t fool yourselves into thinking it will be easy to get back on track.  When you’ve allowed (consciously or by default) so many distractions to let you drift apart, by natural attrition, it’s going to take some effort to reconnect.

When I see people, I often make suggestions on how to improve their intimacy, but of course, it’s difficult to take home what you’ve learned and start practicing on an unsuspecting partner, particularly if said partner is the reason you came to see me in the first place. 

My idyll is to see couples and teach them tantalizing ways to up the ante in the bedroom, which then flows onto greater love and deepened appreciation for each other.  But if you’re not at that point, or you think doing an erotic couples session is a synonym for a “threesome”, here’s a few ways around it, sexually speaking.

he said she said

HOW TO IMPROVE ORGASMS – LADIES FIRST

There are several ways a woman can improve her orgasms:

Explore her body: A woman should take the time to explore her body and figure out what feels good. This can include touching herself in different ways, experimenting with different types of stimulation, and finding the spots that feel most sensitive.

Communicate with her partner: Communication is key in any sexual relationship. A woman should talk openly with her partner about what she likes and what feels good.

This can help her partner understand how to please her and increase the chances of having more satisfying orgasms.

Focus on relaxation and arousal: A woman should focus on relaxation and arousal during sex. This can include taking deep breaths, focusing on the sensations in her body, and using erotic fantasies to increase her arousal.

Try different positions: Different sexual positions can stimulate different parts of the body and lead to more intense orgasms. A woman can experiment with different positions to find what works best for her.

Use sex toys: Sex toys can provide additional stimulation and help a woman achieve orgasm more easily. A woman can experiment with different types of toys to find what feels best for her.

Kegel exercises: Kegel exercises can strengthen the pelvic floor muscles, which can lead to stronger and more intense orgasms. A woman can do kegel exercises by contracting and relaxing the muscles that control urine flow.

he said she said

HOW MEN CAN IMPROVE SEXUAL FUNCTION

There are several ways that a man can improve his sexual function. Here are some suggestions:

Regular exercise: Regular exercise can improve blood flow and help maintain a healthy weight, which can improve sexual function.

Healthy diet: A balanced and healthy diet can help maintain a healthy weight and provide the necessary nutrients for good sexual function.

Stress management: Stress can negatively impact sexual function, so it’s important to manage stress through activities such as meditation, yoga, or therapy.

Kegel exercises: Kegel exercises can help improve the strength of the pelvic floor muscles, which can improve erections and ejaculation control.

Quit smoking and reduce alcohol consumption: Smoking and excessive alcohol consumption can have negative effects on sexual function.

Get enough sleep: Lack of sleep can negatively impact sexual function, so it’s important to get enough restful sleep each night.

Communicate with your partner: Good communication with your partner about your sexual needs and desires can lead to a better sexual experience for both partners.

Consider seeing a doctor: If you’re experiencing ongoing issues with sexual function, it’s important to speak with a doctor or healthcare provider who can assess and treat any underlying medical conditions.

he said she said

THE BENEFITS OF YONI AWAKENING FOR WOMEN

The benefits of seeing an experienced Yoni practitioner include:

Improved sexual health: Yoni practitioners can help women address issues such as pain during sex, low libido, and difficulty achieving orgasm.

Increased sexual pleasure: Practitioners can help women learn more about their bodies and how to achieve greater pleasure during sex.

Emotional healing: Yoni work can help women release emotional trauma and negative beliefs that may be impacting their sexual experiences.

Improved overall well-being: Yoni work can help women connect more deeply with their bodies, improve their confidence and self-esteem, and reduce stress and anxiety.

Better relationships: Women who have experienced healing and growth through Yoni work may find that their intimate relationships are more fulfilling and satisfying.

 

WHY SEE ME?

Yes, it’s true – I can teach you how to tap into your real sexual potential in a matter of hours.  This alone can save you months on your journey to reconnect with yourself and your partner.

Discover how to enhance your intimacy and deepen your connection with my tailored approach.

 

Recognizing each person and relationship is unique, I rely on intuition and never apply a “one-size-fits-all” method with my clients.

As a professional Mistress in the BDSM lifestyle since 2009, I bring a wealth of experience to our sessions, about sensation, trust and communication.

My previous career as a registered nurse equipped me with the skills to establish a professional and trustworthy rapport with my clients from an early stage in my adult life.

With my expertise as a Mistress, I create a safe and consensual environment where we can explore sensations in a present and focused manner.

 

That amazing union can be yours – it’s not gone, it’s just waiting in the wings for life to slow down enough for you to relish each other again.

I hope you’ve enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it.  If you’d like to know more about my services, please feel free to reach out.

Cheers,

Rose Richey

0499 978 955

 

BLOG

BLOG

Welcome to my Blog page.    You’ll find the links below to my posts…..

He Said, She Said

Relationship Reconnection

Awaken Your Yoni

 

DISCLAIMER: The content I provide, including any issues and conditions discussed, are solely my opinions and are based on my personal experiences and perceptions. I do not claim to be a qualified expert in sexology, psychology, or adult relationships. The information I share should not be considered professional advice or a substitute for consultation with a qualified practitioner in the relevant field. If you have any concerns or questions arising from my commentary, I strongly encourage you to seek guidance from a certified professional who can provide appropriate advice and support tailored to your specific needs.

Relationship Reconnection

couples erotic massage brisbane

couples erotic massage brisbane with rose.

RELATIONSHIP RECONNECTION

 

It doesn’t take a sex therapist, a psychologist or even a marriage counsellor to show you how to reconnect with your partner in a deep and intimate way.

Those methods are expensive, clinical, time-consuming and only needed when you’ve  reached crisis point, ie when you’re seriously considering a separation or break up.

Most couples aren’t in that situation, things haven’t gotten to such a low level.

But it’s still common to drift into “snooze mode” and experience apathy, boredom, loneliness and dissatisfaction in your relationship, whether you’ve been together a few months or a few decades.

Logistically you’re still together, but are you really “connected” in an intimate and meaningful way?

One or both of you has done some or all of the following over time – put on weight, been too engrossed in raising your family, expanding your business, your social lives, spent too much time apart.  Your health and energy levels decline.  Or friends and relatives take a lot of your time.

The dry spells you usually experienced following childbirth, grief and disagreements now seem more frequent, for no apparent reason.

And let’s not even get started on mental health issues, menopause, stress, hormonal changes, high blood pressure, diabetes, the list goes on……

You lose that intimate one-on-one “you-and-me-against-the-world” thread between you and your partner, the one that brought you together in the first place.  It’s a distant memory, one that reveals itself in fleeting moments, often when it’s not convenient to act upon your feelings and desires.

Yes, you could spend a weekend away, getting yourselves pampered, nice meals, time to yourselves, but how will that enhance the intimate side of your relationship in the long run?

There’s no room for spontaneity, it all seems contrived and mentally grinding – a lot of hype – and by the time you arrive, you’re usually too exhausted to get the full benefit of that time together.

Maybe you just don’t have the time, support or resources to do those kinds of things on a regular basis.

It’s hard organising someone to take care of your children, your pets and other regular commitments you have so you really can take time out for yourselves and relax.  Like an extended date night, by the time you’re actually relaxed enough to enjoy it, it’s time to go “back to reality”.

couples erotic massage brisbane

Or you go to the adult store, or you’ve seen the lovehoney commercials on TV and ordered something online, only to be disillusioned as the novelty value was lost the first time you used it.  In most instances, it doesn’t deliver the anticipated result, and you can’t return it.  Or worse, you buy something that horrifies your partner.  Your little sidetrack into adventure rapidly goes south, often with long term repercussions.

These days people often work shifts, long hours or away from home for long periods.  By the time they get home, they are “knackered” and just want to sleep the whole time.  But their partner (the one who’s been taking care of the kids and keeping the home fires burning) is just as exhausted from “single parenting” and wants time for themselves.  Or there’s a long list of activities / chores that need doing around the house.

It’s an all too common complaint from many couples, and it puts a lot of stress on relationships, even when money is good.  Money isn’t everything, but it does help lessen the burden for partnerships and families.  Having choices means freedom and a better outlook on life in general.

At the end of the day, you don’t know what you don’t know.

So, what to do?

 

 

My background

I’ve been a lifestyle and professional Dominatrix since 2009.

In 2015, I had the joy of experiencing erotic massage for the first time with Aleena Aspley, an amazing soul, a truly gifted sexological body worker and massage guru.

That first session with Aleena was amazing (“sexual bungee-jumping” was how I described it).

That one session changed my entire outlook and connection with my own sexual power – that knowledge enhanced my self-love and intimacy with my partner, taking it up to another level.  Of course I’ve had many sessions since – there’s nothing like it.

I was so impressed by those unforgettable experiences, when Aleena asked me to become a practitioner and expand her brand, I jumped at it.  It certainly helped that I was a longstanding BDSM Mistress and I’d also been a registered nurse. I could rely on my intuitiveness and reassuring style of dealing with people, establishing trust,  knowing the mindful effects of surrender and release.

But I learned so much more about sensation – tantalising techniques for arousal, key reflexology points in the body and reliable ways to relax even the biggest “stress-puppies”.  The results are (without exception) happy clients whose experiences are uniquely satisfying, rejuvenating and educational.

 couples erotic massage brisbane

Why choose me?

Being mature, intuitive and professional practitioners gives us the edge over “pretty young things” out there.  Don’t get me wrong, we all started with our short little rub-n-tug sessions.

However we realised over time that our real goal wasn’t quick gratification but rather an extended focus on self-connection, and prolonged meditative states (where brain chatter stops).

The results are deeply enhanced and meaningful movement and release of sexual energy (“awe-gasms”) and an awareness of how to help someone use those techniques to realise their potential for intimacy and connection going forward, for themselves and their partners.

If you’ve gotten this far reading my article, it’s clear you have a genuine interest in improving your intimate relationships – firstly with yourself, then with your partner as a positive flow-on.

Yes, by all means, you can come and see me by yourself.  That will be an amazing experience on its own and will have a positive effect on how you deal with your partner going forward.

But when you really want that deep two-sided connection, the commitment to intimacy you’ve been craving for so long you can’t even remember when it last happened, then it’s time to see me for a couple session.

couples erotic massage brisbane

What to expect?

 

Every couple is unique so I don’t apply a “one size fits all” approach to your relationship needs.  (That’s also why my methods and prices are indicative and not clearly structured on my website.)

Many couples come to see me as a “treat”, something decadent to do together, but they always leave with so much more than they expected.

We’ll start with a candid discussion on where you are as a couple now, what you are both looking for (individually and as a couple) and what you want to take away with you from our time together.

Sure, I can do a session where you are passively involved, seeing each other being tantalizing, but I prefer to teach you exactly how to do what I do so you can continue to expand on those techniques at home and take your intimacy to the next level.

Coaching doesn’t take any longer than a relaxation session, and of course it’s brilliant value.

I’ll coach you how to use different relaxation methods to put your partner into a deeply meditative state, then to awaken their Kundalini (sexual energy) and move it around their body to prolong the wait to full release.  Then, when the time is right, they will experience mind-blowing dimensions of sexual arousal and orgasms, all at your hands.

You’ll need around 4 hours to devote the time to fully relax and get accustomed to new techniques and levels of arousal and connection, with my guidance.

You will leave with a better understanding and new appreciation of each other.  You’ll be feeling deeply satisfied, rejuvenated and energised and aware of how to take what you’ve learned into a more deep and intimate connection in your partnership.  Even the memories of what you’ve done in our time together will be enough to reignite that fire.

Text or call me on 0499 978 955 or check out my website to read about others’ experiences and find out more about this unique opportunity to get your relationship “mojo” back.  I look forward to pampering you soon.  You know you deserve it.

Cheers, Rose

Awaken Your Yoni

Yoni Tantric Massage Brisbane

Yoni Tantric massage Hendra with Rose Richie

Awaken your Yoni

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When a woman awakens her Yoni, or vagina, through Tantric massage therapy and bodywork, she not only connects with her female sexual energy, but the process also re-ignites and enhances her sexual pleasure, opens her to greater full body orgasms, and her life and intimate relationships with others fully ripens.

Both a woman and her partner (if she has one) will see her sexual side blossom and elevated to entirely new levels she may have previously thought were not possible.

A woman who is connected with her vagina and her sexual energy experiences everything on a much deeper and more profound level. And we all want to feel deep, deep down when it comes to sex, sexual pleasure and intimacy.

We all crave that blissful, sensual, mind-blowing pleasure and ecstasy that we know is to be found deep within ourselves.

This yearning for divine pleasure and release is what our partners also seek as it is their connection with us that also leaves them feeling deeply fulfilled and sexually satisfied. When both people in a sexual union are connected and aligned, they share in the fruitful benefits of bonding, delight and pleasure.

And it all starts with a woman and her Yoni. And your Tantric journey of awakening your Yoni will be a rewarding and most pleasurable one.

To some women, the notion of awakening or doing anything Tantric with her vagina may seem daunting, scary, weird, nerve-wracking or a plain old waste of time. However, a woman who is in touch with her vagina and is awake to its purpose and its energy, and is also awake to her life and to her existence in the universe. When a woman is connected fully with her Yoni she will rouse the powerful female sexual energy within her that, until now, has lay dormant like a sleeping dragon in between her legs and her hips.

Sexual energy is life energy. Sexual energy fuels and powers relationships between people. It feeds both people in a relationship. It keeps you bonded, connected, deeply in love, and able to explore your sensual side and broaden your sexual experiences without a conscious thought. It also flows through to all other facets of your daily life, not just the sexual.

A woman who is connected with her Yoni is open to all changes and challenges in her life.Yoni Tantric Massage Brisbane

Despite several different types of relationships and sexual adventures throughout her life, many women have only ever experienced clitoris orgasms. On a subconscious level plenty of women instinctively know their body is capable of not only more pleasure, but also more intense and longer lasting pleasure. Only problem is they don’t know how to access this, or no one has shown them how.

Our modern society has done a very good job at keeping sexuality, especially women’s sexuality, locked away behind closed doors and a shadowy secret. Many women, once they start on a Tantric journey of discovery, come to the realization that their Yoni has actually been closed.

There are many things that may cause a woman’s Yoni to close itself. This can be from unsatisfying past relationships, unfulfilling sexual encounters, shame or embarrassment about her sexuality, society or peer group pressures, body image issues, lack of confidence, lack of arousal, mental health issues, abuse, stress, trauma, and so on.

Once a Yoni is closed off the mental and emotional process of reconnecting and reawakening a woman can unleash a tidal wave of built up emotional issues and painful memories that must flow out and be released before the any seeds of sensation and pleasure can be planted.

Only then can the healing process truly begin and the flow of sexual energy and orgasmic energy be given the opportunity to restore everything in a woman’s life.

When a woman’s Yoni is awake, enhanced, toned, strengthened and open, then this positive presence and energy will ripple outwards with the same effect into other areas of life.

When a woman is able to journey deeper inside her own self, then she will also make it safe and inviting for her partner to go deeper inside of her as well, emotionally, physically and spiritually.

Her partner will be attracted to and drawn in by her naturally alluring feminine sexual magnetism. Only when she is truly ready will a Yoni invite anyone inside.

As a woman, once you are awakened you will feel safe with all facets of your feminine sexuality. You will feel safe to be totally present, in the moment, and relaxed enough to orgasm fully and let pleasure wash over you. You will be in a place to let go and surrender.Yoni Tantric Massage Brisbane

I understand if you are in a place right now that leaves you feeling sexually frustrated. I completely get that your sex life may not be satisfactory or may not even exist at all.

Now is the perfect time to stop searching outside of yourself for that elusive missing something or that magical thing that promises to fix you and your sex life. We all know what these things are. These wonderfully alluring cure-alls that promise to fix our sex lives, whether it be another sex toy, visiting a male escort, trying out new sex positions in daring locations, or randomly hooking up on Tinder.

All of these things come with the promise of giving a woman exactly what she needs without her having to ask for it; they will all just know somehow.

None of these things will have any lasting impact. Because at the end of the day it is all about you. It is about you and your Yoni and how you feel about her. It is about how you treat her, worship, connect, respect, understand, admire and pleasure her…or not.

It is about awakening, enriching and reigniting your sexual energy and allowing the power of pleasure and orgasm to open you up to what you want, desire and need from life and your partners.

When a woman is given the knowledge and ability to bring her body and her vagina more pleasure, sensation and bliss through regular Tantric Yoni massage sessions, then she will be able to expand her sexual potential for greater pleasure and more intense vaginal orgasms that connect with a whole body orgasmic experience.

This will also ripple outwards into all other areas of your life, because a woman’s sexual energy is indeed that potent.

If you would like to know more about Tantric yoni massage and bodywork for women, please feel free to contact me.

ROSE RICHEY RELAXATION

 

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Blog by Kinkassage Group Brisbane 13/5/2018

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The New School of Erotic Touch